Monday, December 28, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Urban Dictionary - December 16: immaculate congestion
December 16: immaculate congestion
When traffic is backed up for miles on a highway, crawling along -- and then suddenly everyone returns to normal high speeds without passing an accident, stalled car, or road construction.
We spent 45 minutes bumper-to-bumper for no reason?!? It must be immaculate congestion.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Guitar Hero Christmas
I showed this to Derek and he said, "That is my favorite Guitar Hero Song. It is from Guitar Hero Legend's of Rock and it's an easy song. See it only has three bars."
PS Greenday fans - Next year, the band is getting its own video game, Green Day: Rock Band ! (If Derek had a car, a driver's license and money... he'd be first in line for this)
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Urban Dictionary - Word of the day Face Base
Face Base
The point in a romantic relationship when pictures of the couple begin to appear on Facebook, and or when the relationship status changes to "In a relationship".
"It looks like Kat has made it to Face base with that new guy."
"Yeah his picture is all over her profile now."
"Yeah his picture is all over her profile now."
Labels:
facebook,
urban dictionary,
WOD
Sleeping in...
Sleeping in...
I. Infant - they don't sleep end of story
Toddler - up at first light, too much to do, too many things to destroy
5 yrs - 10 yrs
Weekdays - school - ugh can't pry them out of bed with a crowbar
Weekends - CARTOONS - back up at the ass crack of dawn
11 yrs - 14 yrs
Unknown element
14 yrs - 22 yrs
Who wants to wake up.... ever?
22yrs - childrearing yrs
Weekdays - WORK (one word SNOOZE)
Weekends - There is nothing worth doing that can't wait until after noon
Childrearing yrs
Entirely dependent upon children's ages.
I. Infant - they don't sleep end of story
Toddler - up at first light, too much to do, too many things to destroy
5 yrs - 10 yrs
Weekdays - school - ugh can't pry them out of bed with a crowbar
Weekends - CARTOONS - back up at the ass crack of dawn
11 yrs - 14 yrs
Unknown element
14 yrs - 22 yrs
Who wants to wake up.... ever?
22yrs - childrearing yrs
Weekdays - WORK (one word SNOOZE)
Weekends - There is nothing worth doing that can't wait until after noon
Childrearing yrs
Entirely dependent upon children's ages.
5 Free MP3 Full Albums You Can Download Legally Now - (thanks /www.makeuseof.com)
I can always count on one of my favorite blogs, MakeUseOf for great free or cheap sites etc. They recently shared a list of free albums. Here is the list:
Nine Inch Nails/The Slip - http://theslip.nin.com/
Coldplay/Left Right Left Right Left - http://www.coldplay.com/lrlrl/lr.html
iLL-Literacy/iB4the1.1 - http://m.ill-literacy.com/listen/
The Crimea/Secrets of the Witching Hour - http://www.thecrimea.net/
Across Tundras/Hersds of the the Fathomless Valleys - http://www.mediafire.com/?mn3xn2ziddz
Labels:
Free,
Music,
www.makeuseof.com
Dear Marketers - Stop implying Santa may bring my kid a flat screen TV!
'Tis the season....
My youngest son, Andrew age 6 asked me if I thought Santa was bringing a flat screen TV. Ummm, NO! I asked him why he even asked, he said there was a commercial about it on TV. What a bunch of BS!
My youngest son, Andrew age 6 asked me if I thought Santa was bringing a flat screen TV. Ummm, NO! I asked him why he even asked, he said there was a commercial about it on TV. What a bunch of BS!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Motherhood in the Animal Kingdom
On the riverbank
In Africa
In India
In the Ocean
In the Artic
In Africa
Somewhere near Wal-Mart
In Africa
In India
In the Ocean
In Africa
In the Artic
In Africa
Somewhere near Wal-Mart
Labels:
motherhood,
MOTY,
walmart
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Malapropsim of the Moment, Mind bottling
Mind-bottling
When things get so crazy that your thoughts get all trapped, like in a bottle.
Watch Blades of Glory... Will Farrell, "Wow, mind bottling isn't it?"
Mind-boggling (mahynd-bog-ling)
adjective Slang
- intellectually overwhelming: a mind-boggling puzzle.
- emotionally or psychologically overwhelming; mind-blowing.
Synonyms: amazing, astonishing, breathtaking, eye-opening, mind-blowing, spectacular, staggering, startling, stunning, stupendous, surprising, wonderful
Labels:
Blades of Glory,
Grammar,
Malapropism
Friday, December 4, 2009
I stand corrected - Titanium vs. Lava
My kids talk about hot lava all of the time. They plan games where they are avoiding imaginary hot lava, they threaten to burn each other with hot lava and ask me way too many questions about hot lava. I am sick of hearing about hot lava, even my friends are sick of hearing about hot lava. The most recent debate is a scientific question. I'd like to use my blog to publish my "findings" on this subject.
Andrew believes Titanium is the strongest thing in the universe, second only to God. As such he is convinced titanium is impervious to hot lava. I was certain that hot lava would win this match-up, I stand corrected. Hot Lava would NOT melt Titanium. I should have known better than to argue a scientific point with Andrew.
Titanium vs. Lava – Titanium wins!
How hot is lava?
Lava is extremely hot. Lava can reach temperatures of about 1,250° Celsius. The lava of the Hawaiian volcanoes reach these temperatures. Normal lava temperatures reach 750° Celsius. That is still much hotter than your oven is capable of reaching.
Titanium has a high melting point of 3135°F (1725°C). This melting point is approximately 400°F (220°C) above the melting point of steel and approximately 2000°F (1100°C) above that of aluminum.
Andrew believes Titanium is the strongest thing in the universe, second only to God. As such he is convinced titanium is impervious to hot lava. I was certain that hot lava would win this match-up, I stand corrected. Hot Lava would NOT melt Titanium. I should have known better than to argue a scientific point with Andrew.
Titanium vs. Lava – Titanium wins!
How hot is lava?Lava is extremely hot. Lava can reach temperatures of about 1,250° Celsius. The lava of the Hawaiian volcanoes reach these temperatures. Normal lava temperatures reach 750° Celsius. That is still much hotter than your oven is capable of reaching.
Titanium has a high melting point of 3135°F (1725°C). This melting point is approximately 400°F (220°C) above the melting point of steel and approximately 2000°F (1100°C) above that of aluminum.
How did I not know about the awkward turtle?
I like to think of myself as "in the loop". From time to time I'm reminded I'm not. I had missed out on one of the most important movements in social psychology, the "Awkward Turtle". I did a little research from the most trusted sources, Urban Dictionary, Wikipedia AND YouTube. This gesture is omnipotent. Here are a few snippets:
Some may deem the awkward turtle immature or for the high school crowd. I say NO, this little phenomenon should find its place in everyday vernacular.
Awkward Animals
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Awkward Animals are animal
gestures made to mark an awkward moment or silence. Depending on the situation, it is used to make the situation more awkward or clears the air. There are several awkward animals that exist like the awkward turtle, awkward cow, awkward turkey, and more. This whole awkward animal phase started out with the awkward turtle, hence it is the most common awkward animal used. As people got bored, they made up their own awkward animals until we have a list of outrageous random animals and things. For example, awkward llama, oyster, dragon, table, etc.
Awkward Turtle
The Awkward Turtle is done by placing one of your hands over the other with both palms facing down, sticking your thumbs outward, and rotating both of your thumbs forward in a circular motion. The speed of the rotation reflects on the degree of awkwardness. This gesture is performed after something awkward has just happened or when there is an awkward silence. When someone makes the awkward turtle gesture, the goal of all others involved in the awkward moment is to be the first to make their own turtle gesture and hump the original turtle before any other players can. Within the last two years or so, the awkward turtle has become very popular among high school and college students. Facebook now has more than 500 groups of "awkward turtle" devotees, the largest with more than 27,000 members. But how it started is anyone's guess. Rumors suggest that it originated in the sign language term for "turtle" or "sea turtle." Not true, says Donna E. Gustina, an American Sign Language expert at the National Technical Institute for the Deaf in Rochester, N.Y.. "The hand signal that you see used for the expression 'awkward turtle' is the same as the sign in ASL for platypus." Deaf students at the institute had not heard of the "awkward turtle."
Other Awkward Animals
Various other awkward animals such as the Sexual Tension Squid, the Awkward Humping Starfish, the Sexual Tension Starfish, the Rejection Squid Hi-five and the Monster also exist. There are various other hand gestures used to signify each. There is no specific usage for each, but they most commonly occur in any awkward moment or situation.Urban Dictionary shows awkward turtle entries as early as September 2005.
1. awkward turtle
May 29, 2007 Urban Word of the Day
buy awkward turtle mugs, tshirts and magnets
The animal mascot of the awkward moment.
When you're in an awkward moment, place your hands on top of each other, and spin your thumbs forward. Thus creating the creature know as awkward turtle.
Oh my god, so I was talking to Becky about STDs and I forgot she had syphillis... it was mad awkward turtle
by Final Attempt Sep 6, 2005
Some may deem the awkward turtle immature or for the high school crowd. I say NO, this little phenomenon should find its place in everyday vernacular.
Labels:
awkward,
gestures,
urban dictionary
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Favorite Website of the Day - http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
Who hasn't been guilty of a little passive aggressive behavior? If you did so in a note, be afraid be very afraid!
My favorite blog MakeUseof.com has surfaced another great site, PassiveAggressivenotes.com. "This site portrays pictures of interesting notes submitted by the readers. Most of the notes are hilarious, while some are quite interesting. The humor comes from the sarcasm in the notes where people are politely asked to apply common sense."
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
Here is a glimpse of the great stuff you'll find on this site:
November 5th, 2009 · 157 comments
Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: "We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don't do so daily. She took the occasion of my son's 11th birthday to take a shot at us."
My favorite blog MakeUseof.com has surfaced another great site, PassiveAggressivenotes.com. "This site portrays pictures of interesting notes submitted by the readers. Most of the notes are hilarious, while some are quite interesting. The humor comes from the sarcasm in the notes where people are politely asked to apply common sense."
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
Here is a glimpse of the great stuff you'll find on this site:
waiting for the rapture (and/or a thank you note)
November 5th, 2009 · 157 comments
Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: "We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don't do so daily. She took the occasion of my son's 11th birthday to take a shot at us."
Labels:
funny,
passive agressive,
website
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
An Open Letter to Beyonce
Dear Beyonce,
Why don't you wear pants? I understand you are proud of your legs, I get it. That being said, have you considered a dress, a skirt, a pair of short or even short shorts? There is something disturbing about a grown woman prancing around in a leotard.
Is this the look you are going for?
Perhaps you should consider another stylist. I'm sure your mother could find work at House of Dereon. Hold the phone, oh right, she is already doing her "work" there. We can credit her for this fabulous look.
A quick Google Search of "Beyonce Leotard" returns 820,000. Pro/Con or indifferent I think Google is trying to tell you something.
PUT SOME PANTS ON!
Warmest Regards,
Holy Hot Mess!
Labels:
Beyonce,
chelsea lately,
fashion
I'm just sayin.... this is funny stuff
Hey Target, this is funny stuff. I love the sister rocking the ornament earrings at the end. Nicely done!