Monday, December 28, 2009

2009 in Music (mash-up)

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Urban Dictionary - December 16: immaculate congestion

December 16: immaculate congestion

When traffic is backed up for miles on a highway, crawling along -- and then suddenly everyone returns to normal high speeds without passing an accident, stalled car, or road construction.


We spent 45 minutes bumper-to-bumper for no reason?!? It must be immaculate congestion.

Monday, December 14, 2009

The Joy of Technology - Funny Cartoon


Guitar Hero Christmas


I showed this to Derek and he said, "That is my favorite Guitar Hero Song.  It is from Guitar Hero Legend's of Rock and it's an easy song.  See it only has three bars."  


PS Greenday fans - Next year, the band is getting its own video game, Green Day: Rock Band! (If Derek had a car, a driver's license and money... he'd be first in line for this)





Thursday, December 10, 2009

Urban Dictionary - Word of the day Face Base

Face Base
The point in a romantic relationship when pictures of the couple begin to appear on Facebook, and or when the relationship status changes to "In a relationship".
"It looks like Kat has made it to Face base with that new guy."

"Yeah his picture is all over her profile now."
 

Sleeping in...

Sleeping in...


I. Infant - they don't sleep end of story

Toddler - up at first light, too much to do, too many things to destroy

5 yrs - 10 yrs
      Weekdays - school - ugh can't pry them out of bed with a crowbar
      Weekends - CARTOONS - back up at the ass crack of dawn


11 yrs - 14 yrs 
      Unknown element


14 yrs - 22 yrs
      Who wants to wake up.... ever?


22yrs - childrearing yrs
    Weekdays - WORK (one word SNOOZE)
    Weekends - There is nothing worth doing that can't wait until after noon


Childrearing yrs 
    Entirely dependent upon children's ages.





Friday Fortune Cookie: A Killer Coupon Site (Plus, a Whole Mess of Steals and Deals!): glamour.com

Friday Fortune Cookie: A Killer Coupon Site (Plus, a Whole Mess of Steals and Deals!): glamour.com

5 Free MP3 Full Albums You Can Download Legally Now - (thanks /www.makeuseof.com)

I can always count on one of my favorite blogs, MakeUseOf for great free or cheap sites etc.  They recently shared a list of free albums.  Here is the list:

Nine Inch Nails/The Slip - http://theslip.nin.com/

Coldplay/Left Right Left Right Left -  http://www.coldplay.com/lrlrl/lr.html

iLL-Literacy/iB4the1.1 - http://m.ill-literacy.com/listen/

The Crimea/Secrets of the Witching Hour - http://www.thecrimea.net/

Across Tundras/Hersds of the the Fathomless Valleys - http://www.mediafire.com/?mn3xn2ziddz

Smashing Pumpkins/A Song for a Son - http://www.smashingpumpkins.com/

 




Dear Marketers - Stop implying Santa may bring my kid a flat screen TV!

'Tis the season....
My youngest son, Andrew age 6 asked me if I thought Santa was bringing a flat screen TV.  Ummm, NO!  I asked him why he even asked, he said there was a commercial about it on TV.  What a bunch of BS!

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Motherhood in the Animal Kingdom

On the riverbank 



In Africa 





  



In India 








 







In the Ocean 









  


In Africa 









In the Artic









 

In Africa 







 
 

Somewhere near Wal-Mart 





Saturday, December 5, 2009

Malapropsim of the Moment, Mind bottling



Mind-bottling
When things get so crazy that your thoughts get all trapped, like in a bottle.

Watch Blades of Glory... Will Farrell, "Wow, mind bottling isn't it?"


Mind-boggling (mahynd-bog-ling)

adjective Slang
  1. intellectually overwhelming: a mind-boggling puzzle.
  2. emotionally or psychologically overwhelming; mind-blowing.
Synonyms: amazing, astonishing, breathtaking, eye-opening, mind-blowing, spectacular, staggering, startling, stunning, stupendous, surprising, wonderful

Friday, December 4, 2009

I stand corrected - Titanium vs. Lava

My kids talk about hot lava all of the time. They plan games where they are avoiding imaginary hot lava, they threaten to burn each other with hot lava and ask me way too many questions about hot lava. I am sick of hearing about hot lava, even my friends are sick of hearing about hot lava. The most recent debate is a scientific question. I'd like to use my blog to publish my "findings" on this subject.

Andrew believes Titanium is the strongest thing in the universe, second only to God. As such he is convinced titanium is impervious to hot lava. I was certain that hot lava would win this match-up, I stand corrected. Hot Lava would NOT melt Titanium. I should have known better than to argue a scientific point with Andrew.




Titanium vs. Lava – Titanium wins!

How hot is lava?
Lava is extremely hot. Lava can reach temperatures of about 1,250° Celsius. The lava of the Hawaiian volcanoes reach these temperatures. Normal lava temperatures reach 750° Celsius. That is still much hotter than your oven is capable of reaching.

Titanium has a high melting point of 3135°F (1725°C). This melting point is approximately 400°F (220°C) above the melting point of steel and approximately 2000°F (1100°C) above that of aluminum.



How did I not know about the awkward turtle?

I like to think of myself as "in the loop". From time to time I'm reminded I'm not. I had missed out on one of the most important movements in social psychology, the "Awkward Turtle". I did a little research from the most trusted sources, Urban Dictionary, Wikipedia AND YouTube. This gesture is omnipotent. Here are a few snippets:

Awkward Animals

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Awkward Animals are animal
gestures made to mark an awkward moment or silence. Depending on the situation, it is used to make the situation more awkward or clears the air. There are several awkward animals that exist like the awkward turtle, awkward cow, awkward turkey, and more. This whole awkward animal phase started out with the awkward turtle, hence it is the most common awkward animal used. As people got bored, they made up their own awkward animals until we have a list of outrageous random animals and things. For example, awkward llama, oyster, dragon, table, etc.

Awkward Turtle

The Awkward Turtle is done by placing one of your hands over the other with both palms facing down, sticking your thumbs outward, and rotating both of your thumbs forward in a circular motion. The speed of the rotation reflects on the degree of awkwardness. This gesture is performed after something awkward has just happened or when there is an awkward silence. When someone makes the awkward turtle gesture, the goal of all others involved in the awkward moment is to be the first to make their own turtle gesture and hump the original turtle before any other players can. Within the last two years or so, the awkward turtle has become very popular among high school and college students. Facebook now has more than 500 groups of "awkward turtle" devotees, the largest with more than 27,000 members. But how it started is anyone's guess. Rumors suggest that it originated in the sign language term for "turtle" or "sea turtle." Not true, says Donna E. Gustina, an American Sign Language expert at the National Technical Institute for the Deaf in Rochester, N.Y.. "The hand signal that you see used for the expression 'awkward turtle' is the same as the sign in ASL for platypus." Deaf students at the institute had not heard of the "awkward turtle."

Other Awkward Animals

Various other awkward animals such as the Sexual Tension Squid, the Awkward Humping Starfish, the Sexual Tension Starfish, the Rejection Squid Hi-five and the Monster also exist. There are various other hand gestures used to signify each. There is no specific usage for each, but they most commonly occur in any awkward moment or situation.

Urban Dictionary shows awkward turtle entries as early as September 2005.

1. awkward turtle

May 29, 2007 Urban Word of the Day

buy awkward turtle mugs, tshirts and magnets

The animal mascot of the awkward moment.

When you're in an awkward moment, place your hands on top of each other, and spin your thumbs forward. Thus creating the creature know as awkward turtle.

Oh my god, so I was talking to Becky about STDs and I forgot she had syphillis... it was mad awkward turtle

by Final Attempt Sep 6, 2005






Some may deem the awkward turtle immature or for the high school crowd. I say NO, this little phenomenon should find its place in everyday vernacular.


Thursday, December 3, 2009

Favorite Website of the Day - http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

Who hasn't been guilty of a little passive aggressive behavior? If you did so in a note, be afraid be very afraid!

My favorite blog MakeUseof.com has surfaced another great site, PassiveAggressivenotes.com. "This site portrays pictures of interesting notes submitted by the readers. Most of the notes are hilarious, while some are quite interesting. The humor comes from the sarcasm in the notes where people are politely asked to apply common sense."

http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

Here is a glimpse of the great stuff you'll find on this site:




waiting for the rapture (and/or a thank you note)



November 5th, 2009 · 157 comments

Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: "We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don't do so daily. She took the occasion of my son's 11th birthday to take a shot at us."





Tuesday, December 1, 2009

An Open Letter to Beyonce

Dear Beyonce,

Why don't you wear pants? I understand you are proud of your legs, I get it. That being said, have you considered a dress, a skirt, a pair of short or even short shorts? There is something disturbing about a grown woman prancing around in a leotard.




Is this the look you are going for?



Perhaps you should consider another stylist. I'm sure your mother could find work at House of Dereon. Hold the phone, oh right, she is already doing her "work" there. We can credit her for this fabulous look.






A quick Google Search of "Beyonce Leotard" returns 820,000. Pro/Con or indifferent I think Google is trying to tell you something.

PUT SOME PANTS ON!


Warmest Regards,

Holy Hot Mess!

I'm just sayin.... this is funny stuff

Hey Target, this is funny stuff.  I love the sister rocking the ornament earrings at the end.  Nicely done!